vendredi, novembre 11, 2005

HULA COUGAR! has a new favorite internet.

BROOKLYN BUNNY!

HULA COUGAR! is perforating with Mo Matching Drapes at Lit on Monday. It is HC!5: The Death of Yvette.

mardi, juillet 26, 2005

HULA COUGAR! makes new INTERNETS!

HULA COUGAR! DOT COM got HUMPED real good today. It looks new. Go look and tell friends.

Also there is newish song on ourspace. Go listen. It is about FROLICKING, which is something COUGARS enjoy much - almost as much as HUMPING.

HULA COUGAR! has scheduled a second perforation. This will be in ASBURY PARK, in the state of NUDE PERCEY. It is something called BIG ART SHOW. But do not be confused, HULA COUGAR! still is not art. It will be SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 10th.

Also HULA COUGAR! will do many perforations in NEW YORK CITY soon. Keep pawing at us to find out more.

PLUS! A brand new HULA COUGAR! song called "TOOBEEEEEEE-ARRRR" is to be featured on the first issue of PLASTIC LETTERS ZINE which is a casette tape compilation and zine thing in England somewhere. Far away. You probably won't be able to get it but if you can it will be worth MANY MONIES some day as they are SUPER RARELY LIMITED NEW EDITIONS!

vendredi, juin 10, 2005

Silly bunnies = tasty bunnies!

It has been so long since HULA COUGAR! has internetted! Our aplogies.

We have been very busy since our big debut perforation.

Did you go to ourspace and see the sexxxy pictures of us at Pianos?

Now we hibernate, making plans and looking at fun websites like this one.

GRRR!

mardi, mai 10, 2005

HULA COUGAR! still loves netting the interns!

Live show! HULA COUGAR! at Pianos in NYC! This Thursday, May the 12th! 7:30pm! LIVE! NOT DEAD!



jeudi, mai 05, 2005

the LEGEND of HULA COUGAR!

People! Bunnies! Gird your loins for HULA COUGAR! appearing LIVE! not DEAD! at Pianos, Thursday May 12, 8pm!

WHO LA COUGAR?
Here is how it happened.

Sometime in 2004, a cougar living in a small town in British Columbia, Canada, decided to go on an adventure. People (and cougars) seeking adventure are usually told to "go west!" but if you go west from British Columbia, Canada, you wind up in the ocean. That is not much of an adventure, because cougars don't like to swim.

So the cougar ran east.

And ran.

And ran.

And ran.

Eventually he found himself in a tiny hamlet in the woods of Quebec. He was very tired and hungry from running all the way across Canada. Luckily, the cougar was discovered by a sympathetic man named Serge, who promptly took the cougar in for a nap and some poutine. Serge's friend Yvette came over that evening and was pleasantly surprised to find a cougar curled up on Serge's couch. The cougar was watching "Room Raiders" on MTV, because cougars love MTV.

Serge and Yvette had been planning a road trip, and since the cougar was in the mood for more adventure, they all piled into Serge's red van. Their destination: New Jersey.

Here is where the story becomes sad, or at least wistful. Serge was driving (responsibly) along the Brooklyn-Queens Expressway. Yvette and the cougar were singing songs of travel and adventure in the back. The cougar, as it happened, was very musically inclined. JUST THEN! A massive truck swerved into their lane. Serge, being Canadian and therefore unaccustomed to American defensive-driving standards, simply ducked behind the wheel.

CRASH. BANG. SKREEE. BOOM.

Serge and Yvette woke by the side of the road with emergency responders standing over them. They were not seriously injured, but the shattered windows had scraped and scratched and scarred their faces. Serge's van was wrecked, and worst of all...

THE COUGAR WAS GONE.

"Where is our cougary friend?" cried Serge.
"Come back to us, dear cougar!" sighed Yvette.

The emergency personnel promptly administered sedatives and put Serge and Yvette on a plane back to Canada, because in Canada they have health insurance and prescription drugs.

Now Serge and Yvette must find their missing friend. They wear masks to hide their scraped and scratched and scarred faces, but they behave much like cougars, in order to attract their cougar. Their cougar had mentioned a desire to learn the art of hula-hooping at some point, so Serge and Yvette adopted the name HULA COUGAR! and set out to make musics and performances that might, with any luck, lure a passing cougar in, so they can all return to Canada together.

THE MUSIC OF HULA COUGAR!

HULA COUGAR! makes music that is loud. This is so the cougar will hear, if he is in the area. There is movement, colorful outfits, lyrics about eating bunnies, banging, shaking, rattling, etc., because these are all things that appeal to cougars. Conveniently, these are also things that appeal to humans, at least some humans, the smart ones, that is.

lundi, avril 25, 2005

HULA COUGAR! STREET TEEMING!

HULA COUGAR! wants you! to help make the streets TEEM with COUGARY GOODNESS!

Things to do:
-Write HULA COUGAR! in chalk on your sidewalk.
-Make HULA COUGAR! stickers (see here for instructions) and stick them places.
-Write HULA COUGAR! on colorful pieces of paper and hang the paper on trees, mailboxes, bulletin boards, babies, etc.

If you want, you could indicate that HULA COUGAR! is appearing live! not dead! at PIANOS on THURSDAY MAY 12 at 8PM and people should come enjoy the SOUNDS AND HUMPING.

In other news, HULA COUGAR! has been busy frolicking in the springtime sunshine here in CLINTON HILL. We have also been busy frolicking with SOUND-MAKING EQUIPMENT in prepration for the afore-mentioned LIVE MUSICING at PIANOS. Some of the sounds we are practicing are really awesome! And perhaps more importantly, our outfits are really sexy!

WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM A COUGAR?

Exactly!

HULA COUGAR! loves you!

GRRR.

ps. Does anyone have a good recipe for BBQ sauce? Particularly one that would taste delicious on a BUNNY KABOB?

samedi, avril 09, 2005

on-air undergrads! love HULA COUGAR!

HULA COUGAR! says HELLO and BIG THANKS to our sexy fans at WBAR, the BARNYARD RADIO STATION! WBAR tells the kids all about HULA COUGAR!, and also says: "No rocking! Just humping!" CORRECT! You get an A+, BARNYARD RADIO PEOPLE, because HULA COUGAR! does not need to rock! HULA COUGAR! can COUGAR! And HUMP! And this is more than enough.

You will see. Come to Pianos on May 12. Maybe you, too, can befriend some INTELLIGENT UNDERGRADUATE GIRLS.